

Queen also says to be sure you’re sexting privately and not involving other people, “i.e. “If someone is urging you to cross your own boundaries, don't do it.” Also, they emphasize that you must own your phone - please do not sext your partner on a work phone where your boss or an HR person can freely scroll through your dirty messages.

#Sexual paragraphs for your boyfriend plus#
“Even better if you talk specifically about sexting and agree on what counts as sexting, plus likes and limits,” Queen suggests. For one, you should trust the person not to share the material with anyone even if you break up, and make sure that you both actually want to do it.

Carol Queen, Ph.D., sex educator and staff sexologist at Good Vibrations, tells Bustle that sexting is absolutely OK in a relationship if the circumstances are right. Even Jack and Rose knew what was up (“paint me like one of your French girls,” anyone?). According to a 2019 study from the Sexuality, Sexual Health & Sexual Behavior Lab in the Texas Tech University Department of Psychological Sciences, sexting is also a really great way to communicate sexual desires to your partner - aka, all the stuff you really want to try in bed but may be too nervous to talk about face-to-face.Īs doctoral student Kassidy Cox noted in the study, “People used to write love poems and steamy letters, then when photography became more commonplace, couples used to take boudoir photos for each other." So, it stands to reason that sexting is the next evolution of how couples communicate, flirt, and engage in foreplay. But that doesn’t mean you can’t turn yourself into a sexting genius with a little practice - or, you know, by pulling from an online list of sample sexting ideas.īut before you figure out what to say to initiate a sexy conversation, it may be helpful to know that sexting is incredibly common. Nerves can take over, as can the fear of sounding too cheesy. Sometimes, even when the mood is right, it can be tough to figure out what to say when you’re sexting.
